I can’t believe this has to be said, but wear a face mask, you pricks! How can something as blindingly obvious as wearing a mask during a global pandemic be a controversial topic all of a sudden?
The coronavirus does not care about your opinion or who you support – it infects everyone! If that is not enough, below are more reasons why you should wear a mask and why you must do it urgently.
1. It is super effective.
Seriously, wearing masks saves lives. If you think you are a tough and hardy individual, what is a bit of itchiness in your face compared to the increased protection that you are awarding everyone else and yourself by wearing a mask? If you think you are protecting anyone’s freedom by not wearing a mask, how about not being a prick and wearing one to protect everyone’s freedom to live instead?
2. It is cheap and easy.
Nobody asks you to go the extra mile here, just to be clear. Masks are everywhere these days, and if you look long and hard enough you will definitely find one for free somewhere. Not wearing a mask now just shows that you are a prick who (wrongly) thinks there is no reason for you personally to worry about Covid-19, so why should you wear a mask?
3. It builds trust.
If you and everyone else wears a mask, people, including you, have to worry less. Why not put the minds of those around you, especially the elderly and other vulnerable populations, at ease by slapping that piece of cloth over your mouth, instead of being a prick and not wearing one out of spite?
4. It protects your loved ones.
Maybe you don’t care about protecting the anonymous masses. But surely you care about protecting your own family? You could catch Covid-19 somewhere and not even know about it. But if your Grandma caught it, you would certainly know. And she will know what a prick you are, when she dies in a coughing fit.
5. It can be a fashion accessory.
You don’t have to care at all about health benefits of masks and still wear one. Buy one of those fashionably printed ones. Take a sharpie and scribble profanities on your mask. This way, you may still be a prick, but at least you are not threatening anyone’s health.
6. It turns you into a role model.
Even in the unlikely case that you wearing a mask does not end up doing anything for you or your loved ones, it still helps. Because other people see you wear a mask and then they will wear one, too. Nothing stops you being a prick like being a role model instead.
7. It will hide the foul smell of your mouth cavity.
Maybe none of these reasons convinced you. Congratulations, you are determined to be a prick. Still wear a mask though, otherwise people will notice the prickly smell coming from your mouth.
In all seriousness, masks do save lives. There is no reason not to wear one in public unless certified by a physician, and it is the least everyone can do to contain the virus as much as possible.